The little things in life...

It always takes something little to change our perspective.  Today a new and dear friend showed up with flowers to cheer my day, I also received a note in the mail with pictures of my dad from a cousin.  Some of the pics I have never seen and it was a very nice thing for her to do.  It didn't dawn on me until tonight that maybe he's up in heaven looking down on my struggles and it was his way of showing me that he understands...and my wonderful cousin happened to come upon these pictures and thoughtfully mailed them to me.

I have been struggling with another little side effect as I have been told various times that they will come and they will go.  Interestingly enough I didn't have as many issues until summer...SO I can complain about them, but in reality I am glad its happening now while I have a chance to relax.  If not for summer I would be spending my time worrying about finding a sub.  My friend Donna once said to me that GOD gave me health issues to make me slow down a bit.  SO for the past 3 days I guess hes been trying to tell me that and I have not listened.  I try not to complain about the crappy side effects and hopefully I don't complain more than I am aware of.  I still consider myself a newbie when it comes to the side effects from the chemo and the symptoms/issues from the CML.  (Sometimes they overlap.  In my head a picture floats around of a venn diagram overlapping the two together.)  For the past 3 days I have been following doctors orders and listening to my body. Today my nurse called after putting her head together with other nurses and decided to put me on fluids and change the time I take my chemo. After just normal drinking of fluids, I started to have some severe pain that didn't subside.  SO my awesome nurse tells me to get it checked out because it could indicate something very serious ending up with me having surgery.

Photo by Julie Williams

 After a 4 hour stint at Urgent Care and a quick trip to the pharmacy, I decided to lay down, sip some fluids and rest.  I logged onto FB.  To make a long story short, a pic from a dear friend popped up in recent activity.  It reminded me of the day when Jesse was about 4.  It was a beautiful sunset with the rays popping through the clouds.  Jesse pointed and said "Look, that is where Jesus lives."   NOT sure why this particular picture hit me over the head and reminded me to just enjoy the little things.  It just gave me a little more clarity.  It brought me back 12 or so years to my sweet little boy showing me that GOD is close and watching over us.  As I looked at Julie's picture it made me aware that GOD does know my struggles and in a subtle way reminded me that HE is right here along with me on this journey.  

As a result, here I go starting a 3 day regimen of clear liquids to be followed by the BRAT diet for a while.  Its really the little things that keep me going.  In all honesty, many of these things I don't seem to take the time to notice.  SO I guess now I am listening.  The house can wait, the yard can wait, laundry can wait. Cancer WON'T wait and its time to just relax and enjoy a few days of taking care of me.  SO for now I am grateful that I don't need emergency surgery and  was able to realize that GOD is just telling me to slow down.